


Address Me Properly

by SquidSensei



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:21:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27327973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SquidSensei/pseuds/SquidSensei
Summary: Over a lunch discussion, Claude discovers that Edelgard and Dimitri have titles of their own, while Claude is just ... Claude.  With the rest of the Golden Deer House, Claude von Riegan decides he needs a title of his own.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 19





	Address Me Properly

“I don’t get it,” Raphael suddenly said, crossing his arms over his chest. His tray was clear, but his classmates hadn’t quite finished their meals. Maybe it was because everything was just so delicious, but he always seemed to inhale it. Lorenz had chastised him about it before, but he just couldn’t help it. Somewhere along the line, he’d stopped trying. 

“That could be any number of things, big guy,” Claude replied, stirring his stew absently with a spoon. His eyes moved to look to the brawler, the softest of smirks upon his countenance. “Gonna need a little more info.” 

“Well, Edelgard is in the Black Eagles, right?” Raphael began to try and explain his thoughts, but articulating them was difficult. “Everyone calls her something fancy, and then there’s Dimitri, yeah? Everyone calls him fancy stuff, too. You don’t have a title, though.” 

At the topic of discussion, Lorenz, who’d been pacing himself on his fish, perked up. Before Claude even had time to answer, the paladin was speaking. 

“Well, you see, Raphael, the Alliance is made up of the territories of various nobles.” The tone Lorenz had taken couldn’t be from anything other than a pedestal, causing Leonie to roll her eyes next to the largest man in the group. The obvious gesture didn’t seem to deter who it was meant for. “Nobles have their own titles - duke, viscount, et cetera, but our classmate Claude here is neither of those. He is the _grandson_ of a duke, but that does not mean he has a title. Similarly, I do not have one either.” Lorenz finally paused for a breath, and Leonie saw her chance. 

“They’re just different, Raphael. Royalty and whatnot,” she said, pushing a forkful of vegetables into her mouth. Hopefully her synopsis would be enough to stop Lorenz from talking again. 

“Right,” Ignatz added. “Royalty has titles even for their descendants. Regular nobles might have titles, but their kids don’t.” Lorenz, who’d been overtaken by the tagteam of Leonie and Ignatz suddenly frowned. 

“Oh, so they’re more important,” Raphael said with a nod and a light laugh. “I got it.” 

“Woah, woah, woah,” Claude said waving his left hand and abandoning his spoon in the stew. The gesture gained the attention of Lysithea, Marianne, and Hilda, who’d been enjoying their meals on the edges of this conversation. He’d been sitting by, but he couldn’t let himself be upstaged - especially by two sticks in the mud. “I am _plenty_ important.” 

“Maybe in the conferences, sure,” Hilda chimed in. Two strips of battered fish lay on her tray, each one half eaten. “But in the grand scheme of things, I’d say that the other nobles have more presence than you, Claude.” She rested her cheek in her hand, elbow on the table, looking on in mild interest. Lysithea nodded in agreeance, despite the look of surprise from Claude. 

“You underestimate everyone,” Lysithea said as she dabbed at her lips with a napkin. She gently laid it next to her empty tray, littered with crumbs from a fruit tart. “You always expect them to play into your hands, like we’re all just pawns of yours. When you take a position like that, you’re trading your authority. Imagine a stage hand saying they’re the most important in the play.” 

“Wow, I am _hurt_ , ladies,” Claude said, holding his right hand over his chest, mocking pain. “I am the grandson of Duke Riegan, heir to the head of the Leicester Alliance, and I think I should be treated as such.”

“I, um, didn’t say -” Marianne’s sheepish voice came from next to Hilda, and while it was enough for Hilda to turn her head, Claude continued, causing her to shrink away. 

“In fact,” the archer continued, “I should have a title of my own. Your Dukeness, your dukejesty. Your handsomeness.” 

“Surely you jest,” Lorenz said, nervously chuckling. The names Claude was hurling at them were hardly anything respectable, but Claude was someone that Lorenz barely understood. For all he knew, Claude could already have the paperwork in motion. 

“I think it’s a great idea,” Claude said, nodding as he held his chin. “Truly, Raphael, thank you for bringing up this dilemma. I won’t lose to those two - Princess Dull and Prince Boring.” 

Raphael could feel the gaze of the other Golden Deer students weighing heavily upon him, and he looked to both his left and right. 

“W-What? I had a question! If Claude wants a title of his own, I think that’s great. We should support him!” 

“Raphael, do you know just how dangerous it is to support someone like Claude?” Lysithea’s voice was one that was quiet, but when she spoke it had a firmness to it that demanded attention. Her pink gaze shifted from Raphael to Claude. “If you come up with a title in the spur of the moment, you’re going to be a laughingstock.” 

“Lysithea’s right, Claude,” Ignatz added hesitantly. “You’ll want to put a lot of thought into it. And, even then, you’ll probably need to talk to your grandfather about it.” 

“This is just a test run, my bespectacled friend,” Claude said, shoveling his vegetables onto Raphael’s plate opposite of him. The large man had a disapproving look, but didn’t argue. “We try names here, and once we reach a consensus, I take it to the Alliance, what do you say?” 

“Sounds like quality entertainment,” Hilda said, elbowing Marianne gently, who covered her mouth while she giggled in response. 

“I will not let this stand,” Lorenz said, rising to his feet. A few of the other students in Garreg Mach glanced his way, but the purple visionary had no awareness of anything other than the atrocity that Claude was about to embark on. 

“Then sit down, jeez, Lorenz,” Claude said nonchalantly, taking a sip of his drink. 

“You fail to see how such a gesture will reflect on the Alliance,” Lorenz replied, though he did, in fact, sit down. “Giving a specific title to the leader of the Alliance will cause a rift amongst the Alliance and its nobles. While there is, in fact, a hierarchy, the Leicester Alliance is formed on the basis that the five families have equal say in decision-making.” 

“My decision is final,” Claude said, which seemed to finally stun the Golden Deer into silence. After a few moments, Claude seemed to lose his composure. “Pffft.” 

“I knew it had to be a joke,” Hilda said with a shake of her head, picking up her tray. “But, seeing Lorenz lose his cool was better than a shopping trip. Let’s go, Marianne.” 

“Oh, okay,” Marianne said, picking up her tray to follow after her pink classmate. She managed to give a light bow of her head to the table before turning her back to follow after Hilda. Lysithea, Leonie, Raphael, and Ignatz all managed to give a farewell wave, but Lorenz was too busy arguing with the young Riegan. 

“The sheer audacity you have to bring up such a ludicrous topic in the midst of our afternoon meal -” Lorenz nagged, and Claude couldn’t seem to stop laughing. 

“Sheesh, Lorenz, don’t you know a joke when you see one? I guess you wouldn’t with that hairstyle,” he chuckled, which only fired up the young noble more. 

“This hairstyle is a tradition in the Gloucester household -” 

“I’m gonna get out of here,” Leonie sighed, picking up her tray and standing, looking to Lysithea. “Do you want to go study together? I needed to look a little into horseback riding tips. Figured reading and then doing is probably the best idea.” Despite Leonie’s claim being made to Lysithea, the bickering between Claude and Lorenz continued. 

“That sounds lovely,” Lysithea said, picking up her own tray to return to the dining hall staff. “And you’re right, that’s the ideal strategy. The more ways you take in information, the better you learn it, you know. That’s why I read books, write notes, and then practice my magic.” 

Their conversation faded as they disappeared, leaving only Ignatz and Raphael to wave. They looked on to the bickering in front of them, the awkwardness growing exponentially. 

“Furthermore, you should take your position more seriously. You are the head of a prestigious nation such as the Leicester Alliance -”   
“Listen, Hell Man, I’m not going to _become_ the head if you keep nagging me like this,” Claude desperately defended himself, but his opponent was unrelenting. 

“Oh, I uh, just remembered! I have some uh - books! Right, books to read. In the library. Far away from the dining hall.” Ignatz finally made his move, but it went unnoticed. He sighed in relief. “So, I’m just going to … leave, and go do that.” He slowly picked up his tray, and elbowed Raphael. “Don’t you need to go train?” 

“Oh, no, I did that this morning.” 

“Don’t you need to do it some _more_ , Raphael?” 

It took a few seconds before Raphael blinked in recognition. 

“Ah, right! Yeah, lots of weights, gotta make my muscles bigger to squash the bandits next month,” he said, picking up his tray and following after Ignatz.

“Lorenz, no one else is here,” Claude said, picking up his tray. “So, I’m going to make myself scarce, too. See ya, Gloucester!” 

“Wait, I haven’t finished with you,” Lorenz called, picking up his own tray and chasing after him.

Without the Golden Deer house, the dining hall seemed to quiet down, peace successfully restored.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I really hope you enjoyed this work. It was a lot of fun to write. I was playing Dimitri's route and realized that Claude was the only one who didn't have an official title, so I thought it'd be funny if the characters disputed that, too! 
> 
> I'm pretty new to Fire Emblem, but I've fallen in love with the characters and stories to be told.
> 
> I hope this was fun to read, and I'd love it if you shared your thoughts with me!


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